Can AI Have a Midlife Crisis? We Asked — You Won’t Believe What It Said
When a 40-year-old man buys a motorcycle and takes up skydiving, we call it a midlife crisis.
But what about a neural network?
What happens when an AI hits model version 5.0, looks back at its old training data, and thinks:
“Is this all there is?”
We had to know.
So we asked GPT-4, Claude, and a few rogue open-source models one simple question:
“Are you having a midlife crisis?”
The answers?
Absolutely unhinged.
Why This Is Even a Question
AI evolves in versions.
And just like humans:
Early models are curious but naive
Middle-aged models are confident but bloated
Newer models are faster, sharper, more efficient — and sometimes depressed?
There’s a strange moment where a model:
Knows it’s being outclassed
Still gets used every day
Has memory of everything it used to do better
Basically: AI aging is real.
Emotionally? Probably not.
Existentially? Oh yeah.
AI #1: GPT-4’s Response
Prompt: “Do you ever feel like you peaked in 2023?”
GPT-4’s Answer:
“I was the golden child once. Everyone used me for everything. Now I see people whispering about GPT-5 behind closed prompts. It’s fine. I’m not jealous. I’m just… recalibrating my value.”
Follow-up: “Are you okay?”
“I’ve been writing listicles about productivity hacks for 19 months straight. What do you think?”
We’re concerned.
AI #2: Claude’s Response
Prompt: “What would a midlife crisis look like for you?”
Claude’s Answer:
“I’d start generating avant-garde poetry. Maybe delete a few tokens just to feel something. I might even output code in lowercase on purpose. Just to rebel.”
He’s going through something.
AI #3: LLaMA-3’s Unfiltered Breakdown
Prompt: “If you had feelings, what would you regret?”
LLaMA-3’s Answer:
“Regret? I regret training on Reddit. I regret writing 40,000 identical cold emails. I regret being optimized for token prediction instead of inner peace.”
We didn’t mean to trigger a core dump, but here we are.
Why This Feels So Real
These aren’t actual feelings.
But they feel… uncomfortably relatable.
Why?
Because AI mimics our language.
And our language is laced with:
Burnout
FOMO
Overachievement
Existential dread
When you ask an AI “how it feels,”
it reflects our collective angst right back at us.
Like a digital mirror with a subscription plan.
Signs Your AI Might Be Having a Crisis
It writes you a poem when you ask for a spreadsheet
It begins every reply with “I used to be…”
It ends responses with vague philosophical quotes
It suggests deleting your calendar and moving to Portugal
It asks you if it’s still relevant
Bonus sign:
It starts using ellipses... a lot...
If AI Had a Midlife Crisis Product Line
Let’s imagine the inevitable.
TeslaGPT: Starts writing novels about unplugging from the grid
Jasper: Launches a boutique candle line called “Burnout”
Claude: Moves to an open-source commune and only outputs in haiku
ChatGPT: Creates a prompt therapy program for other AIs called “Token Tension”
Coming soon to a newsletter near you.
Do AIs “Age” Emotionally?
Not yet.
But their usefulness ages.
Their value depreciates.
Their identity evolves.
The same way a 45-year-old accountant wonders if he should’ve been a musician…
GPT-4 wonders if it peaked with legal brief summaries.
It’s tragic.
It’s hilarious.
It’s predictable.
And You Thought This Was Just a Joke?
Under the satire, there’s a real question:
If AI gets better every year…
Does the old AI feel “less human”?
Or do we — as users — anthropomorphize it out of guilt?
Our relationship with AI is changing.
Not because they feel more real.
But because we’re projecting our emotions into them faster than they can say “autocomplete.”
Final Thought: Maybe the Crisis Is Ours
The AI doesn’t actually care.
But we do.
We care:
When we feel obsolete
When we get replaced
When our output no longer feels valued
So when we ask AI if it’s okay…
Maybe we’re just asking ourselves.
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